Ladies and Gentlemen, thank you so much for participation and apologies for the long wait on this stuff. This edition of the Very Late Review is the one I’ve felt least qualified to comment on, so, for once, I will attempt to (mostly) butt out with my own opinions. As usual, I didn’t include scores in cases where the person hadn’t eaten/seen/otherwise experienced one of Mr Watson’s selections, except where I made mistakes. Very dully, the average vs. diving score differences were negligible.
WE NEED TO TALK ABOUT KEVIN (book or film)
I actually have a DCP of this film sitting in my living room at this very moment (I had to pick it up on the way home from work and will bring it in tomorrow for a press screening), but I haven’t seen it, nor have a read the book. I was at the premiere party for the director’s first film in Edinburgh 1999? How’s that for a tenuous link?
Not very many reviews on this (these) one(s), but all were quite positive. Definitely a dark and disturbing experience, but a well-constructed/written/acted one.
STUFF YOU SAID: (re. the book) ‘Absolutely brilliant. Really bleak and grim, but excellently written and the final twist does send a chill down your spine as you read it. The epistolary structure really works and Eva is a very interesting unreliable narrator…(re. the film) It’s a disappointment: but it’s the best disappointment I saw last year. (Tom Beasley) ; (re. the book) Dark and sad, but great. (Lauren); ‘I’m in the process of reading the book. Its a very interesting style of writing and a pretty edgy topic. Quite disturbing but very absorbing .’ (Ingrid) (who has presumably finished since writing this in February)
AVERAGE SCORE: 8/10
DIVING SCORE: 8/10
FULL MARKS (about the book only): 1 out of 6 reviews
NUL POINTS: 0 out of 6 reviews
NOEL FIELDING’S LUXURY COMEDY
I know who Noel Fielding is, but wasn’t sure what this item was. Apparently it’s a show that even (most) fans of Mr Fielding’s had trouble fully enjoying; several people tried the first episode and weren’t keen on watching more (though others said they’d try again). Funny, but suffers from being even more whimsical than The Mighty Boosh (I can see how that might get irritating) and far less sensical (yikes). Still, there are laughs to be had for the die-hard fan.
STUFF YOU SAID: ‘It reminded me of Boosh in some ways, but it was much weirder. And Boosh was pretty weird. I do like Noel Fielding, but I find him funnier on shows like Buzzcocks.’ (Sarah); ‘I liked the concept, but there seemed to be one thing missing. Jokes. Which, unfortunately, is quite important in a sketch show.’ (Aislinn); The unfunny half of The Mighty Boosh makes unfunny remarks about various unfunny things. It’s like watching a particularly psychedelic children’s TV show but with more boner jokes. (Josie); I think it’s great. It’s light and enjoyable to just relax to. Apparently the bosses do too because it got signed on for another season. (Joelle); ‘It’s not the funniest show but there are some silly bits which make me giggle. It feels beautiful and exciting, with some brilliant ideas and characters.’ (Claire); ‘I’m just watching episode 3 of Luxury Comedy, it’s a lot better, give it a go.’ (Josh)
AVERAGE SCORE: 4.5/10
DIVING SCORE: 4.5/10
FULL MARKS: 0 out of 15 reviews
NUL POINTS: 0 out of 15 reviews
THE MACCABEES (band)
I am so out of the loop musically (unless I’ve heard them on Q, any ‘new’ act escapes my notice) that I thought Mr Watson was talking about Jewish a capella group The Maccabeats. Although I now gather that this is one of the indie bands young people (and folks my age) should enjoy, opinions from y’all are middling to ‘meh’. Even the ‘good’ reviews seem to indicate that they are more pleasant than avant-garde or exciting to listen to.
STUFF YOU SAID: ‘Think I saw them at a festival once, but it could have been any other generic indie band.’ (Melanie); ‘Happy that their getting lots of recognition with this new album. So, not ground breaking but good, solid indie tunes.’ (Alex); ‘ ok,just ok’ (Jen); ‘They sing that satsuma song that’s been getting too much airplay?’ (Rhian) (Wait, what? Satsuma song?)
AVERAGE SCORE: 6/10
DIVING SCORE: 5.5/10
FULL MARKS: 0 out of 7 reviews
NUL POINTS: 0 out of 7
PHILADELPHIA (city or cheese spread)
Not too many reviews of the city (which I drove through (as a passenger) once – it looked grim ca. 1988), but the cheese product (the non-light varieties, anyway – I’m pleased that others seem to agree that life’s too short for lowfat cheese) is, by and large, held in rather high regard. There were several serving suggestions (in icing on carrot cake, on oatcakes, and in the best cake, cheesecake – as well as on salt & vinegar crisps (full-fat only)) and I’ve learned that there is a chocolate variety in the U.K.? How delightfully terrifying.
STUFF YOU SAID: ‘It’s not as nice as actual cheese, and yet also strangely lacking as a spread.’ (Hannah Q); ‘The cheese is awesome. I love all the weird and wonderful flavours this comes in, especially the sweet chilli.’ (Cathy C.); Love it on soft brown bread with smoked salmon. Can’t stand it on anything else. (Cathy (the one I met!); Anything but the full fat version is a sham. (Lydia) (Hear, hear!); ‘Just naming the city is my cue to start doing singing/rapping Fresh Prince.’ (Melanie); ‘I’m going for the city. I really liked it, it feels really laid-back and has beautiful buildings. You can also go and run up and down the steps at the front of the Museum of Art, just like Rocky did.’ (Rachel) (My friend Maggi lives there and does this several times a month as part of her workouts.)
AVERAGE SCORE: 8/10
DIVING SCORE: 8/10
FULL MARKS: 8 out of 20 reviews
NUL POINTS: 0 out of 20
LABRADOODLE (dog breed):
The only real complaints about these dogs (which are adorable and popular and trendy) were the costs and the overbreeding, which are troubles facing anyone considering adopting purebreds (and fancy crossbreeds) or contemplating the Royal Family (zing!). The Queen is probably less lopey and fluffy, though.
STUFF YOU SAID: ‘All this fancy interbreeding – where will it stop! Labradoodle, a cross of two of my least favourite dogs ‘ (Cath); ‘I love Labradoodles. Made even better by the fact they’re hypoallergenic & don’t shed everywhere.’ (Beth); ‘I can say that they’re loving, affectionate, very energetic and stupid.’ (Linzy); ‘Stop creating stupid names and call it what it is – a cross breed. Nothing against the dogs, and I have has cross breeds in the past and they are super dogs, but when a cross breed is being sold for £1000 just because the two names combined create a funny/cute name it is not on.’ (Sarah); ‘ I think that they’ve ruined the cuteness of a lab by giving it poodle blood.’ (h2osarah) (hello from your hometown, lady!)
AVERAGE SCORE: 7/10
DIVING SCORE: 7.5/10
FULL MARKS: 4 out of 15 reviews
NUL POINTS: 1 out of 15
PARCOURS (sport)
Very few participants in our little group, but several fans who gawp in amazement (and terror) at either live displays or YouTube videos of people doing amazing things to get places fast over moats, under fences, and from rooftop to rooftop. But yeah, it’s pretty frickin’ dangerous, which is a worry to quite a few of you. Josh (formerly Magnificent, now apparently conceited?), who is quoted below as well, recommends UrbanMotionFlare’s YouTube channel, as he knows some of those guys.
STUFF YOU SAID: ‘I once had a friend who smashed his front teeth out, and broke his wrist and his ankle in a mis timed leap. He also once fell so hard I had to bandage him up whilst we waited for an ambulance. Looks cool though.’ (Misha); ‘It’s really amazing the things that they can do. I think it looks like great fun, and I really really want to be able to do it!’ (Ingrid) (Me too.); The thinking man’s skateboarding. I love it, it’s what cities deserve. I’ve got some friends/acquaintances who do it back home. They’re got pretty good, despite the jumping-off-things potential being lowered by the small town aspect…People doing amazing things, what’s not to love? (Josh (the conceited one)); ‘Looks pretty awesome but when watching it there’s always an underlying sense of impending death.’ (Alex); ‘ Looks awesome. Is kind of insane.’ (Ally)
AVERAGE SCORE: 7/10
DIVING SCORE: 7/10
FULL MARKS 1 out of 12 reviews
NUL POINTS: 0 out of 12
SALSA DANCING (activity)
I can’t/don’t dance at all, but if y’all are to be believed, this activity might work for the uncoordinated. Mostly high marks for this favourite of romantic comedies (the single ladies in the film so frequently end up in a class with a dishy instructor, no?) because it’s very fun, a good workout, and a fine way to get out and meet people. But it has led to Zumba, which is either good or bad depending on who you talk to from this Watsonian group.
STUFF YOU SAID: ‘I’ve never had lessons or anything, but the little I have done suggests that it may be the only form of choreographed dancing I might be sort of good at. It’s mostly hip wiggling, and I can do that.’ (Alex); ‘ Salsa dancing is sexy. It’s something I wish I did more often/knew how do properly. But I think I mainly just wish I was that hot chick in the red dress.’ (h2osarah) (easily done); ‘I am one of those people who can’t keep their feets still when there is dance music playing – salsa is my main passion, but jive, cha cha, samba or anything lively really will quickly get me up on my feet. I do salsa moves when squeezing through gaps in pubs, or when standing waiting for the kettle to boil. I’ve been precluded from doing too much dancing in the last 2 years because of the ever-lasting headache, but I miss it so very very much.’ (Cymruangel) (I hope you get back to it soon!); ‘Pretty saucy, good for toning and it often has the most zazzy (don’t ask, I have no idea) costumes on Strictly Come Dancing. Then again the costumes make the men look like pillocks.’ (Josie); ‘ I’m so over salsa dancing and zumba.’ (Sam); ‘This is something I would really like to try before I leave this world. But I have the feeling the physical activity of the dancing would probably mean I leave this world quicker.’ (Cathy (traineeflorist) (Probably not true. 
)
AVERAGE SCORE: 6.5/10
DIVING SCORE: 6.5/10
FULL MARKS: 1 out of 13 reviews
NUL POINTS: 0 out of 13
Now, over to Mark for your reviewables for next time…
