Give a Pole a book: results
A while ago I asked if anyone knew some – let’s not mince words – Foreign People who might like a copy of one of the translations of Eleven which are knocking about our flat, taking up more space than we can legitimately allot to copies of a book which, to be honest, I have already read. I asked people to submit either themselves or friends, with the prizes going to people who were the most influential and therefore most likely to make the book the Da Vinci Code-sized hit which we all hope it will be. Here are the winners:
The FRENCH version goes to Ingrid who knows a well-travelled Frenchwoman who, among other things, often goes to Nepal: a market that I’m looking to crack as soon as possible. The Frenchwoman belongs to a program which links up schools around the world, which is also promising. Catch ‘em young, etc. Plus she’s an author herself. Ideal.
Similarly, the ITALIAN version was won by Jen, who knows someone who runs several language schools in Italy, and hence may be able to make Undici, the Italian incarnation, into ‘an educational must-have’. I like the sound of being a must-have.
Knox gets the GERMAN edition to give to a German (obviously) who can speak five languages and has lived in many different places.
The AMERICAN one, I’ll give to Lisa who suggested herself, as a director with the potential to ‘spread love for ‘Eleven’ all over North America’. She also added that, being a theatre director, she is totally broke, which is a perfectly legitimate reason for trying to scrounge a copy.
The POLISH copy goes to Andrew who knows a Pole so hard-working that she’s almost certain to become famous or powerful.
If you didn’t win or weren’t eligible to enter because of the old not-knowing-enough-foreigners problem, don’t despair: there are Dutch, Czech, Portuguese and Korean versions still to come, and no doubt I will also be sent a box of each and Emily will sigh quietly as the delivery man rings the doorbell, and I will be back with another exciting giveaway/useful clearout.
Now all that remains is to arrange for delivery of these books, which – as you’ll know if you’ve won anything on this blog before – is no easy matter (I’m still working on that Toblerone, guys). There are two options. You can give me your address (in secret, using Twitter or a confidential email or some such). Or, you can collect it at one of my shows. If you collect it, you’ve much more chance of getting it soon. If you wait for it to be posted, it’s less hassle for you, but it might take a long time. It’s entirely up to you. Let me know what you want to do. And keep me in touch with what, if any, acts of Eleven-popularising your contacts have managed to achieve. I might offer a supplementary prize for whoever’s foreign friend does the best job of spreading it about. As it were.
To bring you up to date with other interfering-with-people’s-lives endeavours on this site:
-Just 24 hours after opening for business, the bespoke courier service I’ve set up with long-suffering tour manager Giles got its first order yesterday, when Zoe brought a package to the Exeter show which she was already planning to send to fellow blog-reader Aislinn, but hadn’t got round to posting yet. It’s almost like THE WORLD WAS WAITING FOR ME TO SET UP AS A COURIER. The package will be delivered in Epsom in July, only just over a month after it was sent, which is pretty efficient. And we’ll actually be able to guarantee a delivery time, rather than – like some of our competitors – making you stay in from 9am until midnight three days later (satire). There was also an enquiry from my dad about taking a sofa to my brother’s new flat. We’re considering whether this is an appropriate venture for Watson Wakely Bespoke Couriers. I’m also considering the question of how often my dad reads my blog.
-Still toying with the other of a follow-up to Project Preston, where we bus people from Preston to a specific tour show, purely for the enormous fun which this is. A couple of people said they could make it to Manchester or Kendal. But someone also suggested a service to pick people up and take them to the DVD record in Bristol. I’m pretty much crazy enough to organise this (or get Giles to, ahem) because it would make a great DVD extra and, again, be spectacular stupid fun. So: is anyone keen either to come to Manchester or Kendal or alternatively Bristol, but the travel costs make it prohibitive? Keep getting in touch and we’ll put another divvy plan together.
-Lastly, a couple of people keep suggesting that I start a Lonely Hearts type service on this blog (although I don’t think they’re a potential couple, unfortunately). And last time I raised it, someone wrote ‘please do this, I’m desperate’, before quickly amending it because desperate isn’t attractive apparently. Anyway – I’m going to at least open the doors. If you are looking for love, submit a 50-word ad about yourself and I will post any I receive. You can of course send it directly to me rather than sticking it straight in front of the eyes of the world. Use the usual channels.
That’s me done with meddling for this evening. I’m on in Exeter again tonight. Oh, after all that talk about the book, I nearly forgot to mention it’s officially out in paperback tomorrow in the UK. But you’ve read it already, haven’t you?
Posted by Briony on June 10, 2011
‘we’ll put another divvy plan together’ – love it – the word and theplan. I’ve not heard anyone use the word div for years. I think I shall resurrect it.
Posted by Rachael on June 9, 2011
I want to come to Bristol, but im unemployed and live in Norfolk. I think that is quite far away.
Posted by sarahthemonkey2 on June 9, 2011
I tried a sort of lonely heart column once, it was in a science fiction mag. In the end I think it was about 14 people who contacted me. However I’m still in touched with 2 of them so that’s a plus but neither lives very close to me.
That the problem with living this far north, neither comedians or sci-fi fans seem to be able to find you. (By North I mean Scotland, I’m near Aberdeen and cannot wait till the 9th December)
Still if you get any russian copies I know a few people and then they would probably pass them along.
Posted by Beth on June 9, 2011
I very much want to come to Bristol but have had no pennies for a while – hitching a lift would be brilliant!
Posted by Juliet on June 9, 2011
And what about a Spanish version of the book? “Once”. Give me a few years so I can get my degree and translate it myself. Or just give it to someone who already translates books for a living. It’d be lovely to have a version in Spanish as well as the original, the book was simply amazing.
Posted by Knox on June 9, 2011
To nick a Tiernan Douieb phrase, that is hella cool!! Thanks Mark.
I’ll be at the book launch on Monday, so, able to pick it up then. My friend’s already heard quite a bit about the book, but I didn’t tell her about the comp, so it’ll be a nice surprise.
I love the idea of a lonely hearts type thing, though agree with Anji on the wording… though nothing useful/clever to suggest as an alternative.
Posted by Joe's Mum on June 9, 2011
A replay of Project Preston might be looking promising ?! There are three of the original gang of twenty-odd on board so far ,so your idea’s gathering pace and there’s still time for more to sign up soon, hopefully.
Louise has said that she can’t make it down to Bristol so shall we head north to Kendal? I’ll buy the mint cake.
Posted by Katie K on June 9, 2011
Even though I’m getting a lift from Cathy (traineeflorist) to Bristol, if you’re really serious about picking people up & chucking them in the back of the van, I’ll be more than happy with that, all dependent on the exact route you will be taking & it would make a hilarious extra/story to tell. Plus think how green & environmentally friendly too. Why must so many travel individually to the same location, when we can all go tied up in the back of a van. Kx
Posted by Josh (the magnificent one) on June 8, 2011
I fear that there are no eligible Watsonianettes within an hour and a half of me. And anyway, I’m married to Aislinn anyway (in a strictly fictional manner).
I’d like a ladyfriend, but I fear even Watson cannot help me with that.
Even if I am “The Hot Watsonian”
Posted by Ingrid on June 8, 2011
Awesome! Thanks!
Unfortunately i cant come to any of your shows (i mean really cant, not dont want to or would be inconvenient to) but i can twitter mail you my address and work form there. Great!! Thanks again (:
Posted by Cathy (traineeflorist) on June 8, 2011
I don’t know what to say to all this Mark, other than … I bloody love your blog! Insanity rocks
)
See you Monday for dog chewed copy/nice fresh copy book swap x
Posted by Megan on June 8, 2011
ALSO, broken record warning:
I WILL BE DOING THE VERY LATE REVIEW TALLIES THIS WEEKEND. If you haven’t participated and want to, check out the post from April 27. (http://www.markwatsonthecomedian.com/web/2011/04/27/very-late-review-10/)
Thanks!
Posted by Patrick on June 8, 2011
I think you may already know this (apparently you’ve been told), but actually you’ve unwittingly done this matchmaking thing already…
She didn’t really want me to comment, so I shall say no more, because that way I look all enigmatic and mysterious and the like. (Fooling nobody, I know).
Posted by Alex on June 8, 2011
So I’m pretty sure I’m the person that said they were desperate. I think I might have been drinking. Still. Excellent. I can’t describe myself though. My housemate once forced me to join Plenty of Fish and I wrote this:
“Hello.
This is really hard. My housemate just told me that my tweets are funny and that I should write this like I write my tweets. To that end…
“Everyone in the room looks sad. It’s because we ate too much curry.”
That was my last tweet.
So… I like theatre and stand up comedy and wine. (My housemate suggested I wrote cock. I decided against it).
I think this is enough now. My housemate says even if nobody else wants to date me, she will.”
I should probably explain I’ve never actually *used* it. Partly because it would feel like admitting defeat and partly because I get sent messages like ‘wanna f**k?’. Seriously.
Posted by Rachel/Pandora on June 8, 2011
If you want to get me and Helen from Leicester I wouldn’t say no. I can provide in-car sweeties and awful driving music.
Posted by Megan on June 8, 2011
Aw, rats. I thought I’d win something.
As for the Lonely Hearts thing, I don’t think I’d participate as there are oceans between me and any gentlemen Watsonians. And I’m (comparatively) olde.
Posted by Louise on June 8, 2011
I don’t think Bristol would be possible for me purely because I work full time so that would be difficult for me but if that work for everyone else then fair play!
The other 2 shows would definitely be possible though! x
Posted by Jen on June 8, 2011
hoooooooray…….i’ve just nearly given my dog a heart attack jumping round the room after winning the Italian copy…..Mark please can you bring it to your Manchester show as that sounds like the easiest option then i will pass it on to my Italian friend…i will try my best to ensure it becomes a ‘must have’…hehe!Jx
…Also still definately up for any form of ferrying to the Kendal show if seats need filling im there!!
Posted by LisaD on June 8, 2011
Well as the young folk say: w00t! I’ve emailed my address and I giddily (is that a word? Heck, it should be a word!) await my American translation of ‘Eleven!’
Posted by Misha on June 8, 2011
I’m desperate for affection. This is neither attractive nor sexy but fuck it, i’m not exactly a paragon of beauty. Basically I’d just like to be fancied rather than being mothered, not that being mothered isn’t lovely too.
Female 19 seeks Male/Female for cuddles, comedy appreciation and cake.
5’9 36/32/34 likes cake, cats, comedy and knitting. Practical approach to nudity, general liberalist and good with small children. Owner of one cat, techie in training, musician, comedy nerd, bakerist and jokerist. Must like cuddles. Aspergers syndrome.
Oh an unrelated note, i’m coming to Bristol, and would apprecaite any plans that don’t involve me having to buy train tickets.
Posted by Anji on June 8, 2011
Well hope the show tonight is as good as last night. Although having the first show for you to usher in, play the chair game, get a free meal (did you take them up on it?!) and have a PA will take some beating!!
I didn’t talk to someone with the same name during the interval but I did go and ask Zoe if she was Zoe… Luckily enough she was and we had a lovely chat and I saw the above mentioned parcel too! A fab evening thank you Mark!
I’m thinking about the lonely hearts thing but can we call it something less…. Not sure what the word it… But make it something more up beat – we may be single and missing a special someone but lonely makes it sound much worse! Anyways I’ll keep thinking about it, which probably means I’ll not get round to doing a thing about it!!
Posted by Lizzy on June 8, 2011
Yes.