Katy Perry’s dinner
Who likes celeb gossip? Everyone!
So, at the weekend I was staying in Auckland and Katy Perry was TOTALLY staying in the same hotel as me. On the Friday night after her show she tried to get in to a restaurant called Euro, one of Auckland’s flashiest eateries. But she couldn’t get a table for her and her entourage because they were – guess what – full and unwilling to tell their existing diners to go away. She then set her sights on another fancy place, called ‘dine’, where a certain M Watson was eating. I found all this out when the service suddenly slowed up considerably and the waitress said (as if it explained everything) ‘sorry about the wait, but there was some talk that we might have Katy Perry in here’. In the end, the shrill star decided to have room-service and be done with it.
We’re all pretty much used to the strange world of celebrities these days, but it’s quite startling to be reminded that an entire high-class restaurant can be brought to a halt while the staff wait to hear whether they’ll have the privilege of serving a 26-year-old singer whose major cultural contribution so far has been to claim that California girls’ skin is so hot it is capable of melting one’s popsicle. I mean, I don’t have anything against Perry – she’s probably not the most talented person in her relationship, but that’s OK – I’m sure she’s perfectly nice and she probably doesn’t have the expectation that the world will just stop for her to have some chicken. But the world itself does have that expectation, and that’s what’s interesting and a bit bizarre.
And in the end, maybe the world is right to expect that, because here I am blogging about it, and you all read it and knew who I was talking about, and the blog today will have more hits than usual pyrely because her name in the title will lure the odd Googler. If you’re one of those people, hi. This is largely not a celeb blog but it can be totes relevant all the same. I don’t think I can quite bring myself to write ‘totes’ for totally even as a joke. I’m going back to change that now.
Posted by Tracey on May 10, 2011
Hi Mark. I quite like Katy’s music – yes, I’ve been exposed to it by my eighteen year old daughter, but I do think that the restaurant was totally disrespecting it’s already paying customers just because it might have a fairly average singer in to wolf a solitary mung bean – or is that what the talentless Mrs Beckham has for a solid snack?True Rusell Brand doesn’t have to do much except be Russell Brand but we like him that way really. Have you seen Get Him To The Greek? It’s a good laugh.Tracey x
Posted by Andrew on May 10, 2011
1) This is the first time, ever, I have heard the word ‘totes’. I feel old, but not in a bad way.
2) Is Katy Perry really less talented than Russell Brand? That takes some doing. Bear in mind that Russell Brand’s only talent is being Russell Brand, so that means she’s not even very good at being herself.
3) This is terribly shallow, and as a man who has previously been given a cherished Mark Watson ‘very interesting things’ rating I do feel ashamed of myself, but I noticed in a recent news item about the FHM 100 Sexiest Women that Katy Perry had come in at an implausible second place. I don’t find her attractive at all – am I at odds with the nation on this one?
Posted by LisaD on May 10, 2011
I think it’s true that most (though not all) celebrities neither ask for nor want the bizarre level of special treatment they get. I went to high school with a couple of guys who stumbled on to the celebrity A-list and were utterly horrified. One of them accidentally caused a basketball game to start late because the Boston Garden (which seats 20,000 people) decided to hold the game until his group got there. He had no idea, certainly wouldn’t have asked for it and definitely did not enjoy having first 20,000 people and then most of New england pissed at him when the word got out. The injustice of that sticks with me. Someone else decides he’s more important than he is and as a result he had several million people saying versions of “who do you think you are?” for years after the fact.
And Katy Perry, while adorable, is not the most talented part of her relationship. It needed saying!
Posted by Sophie on May 10, 2011
On the subject of celebrity, I am not sure if you are aware of this, Mark, but there is a tumblr dedicated to you. I do believe it is fuckyeahmarkwatson.tumblr.com.
Posted by Beau Brummel on May 10, 2011
Remember the Frankie Boyle incident, Mark? Be afraid – Katy’s got some powerful friends and you almost suggested that she … well … wasn’t quite as talented as some people imagine. Watch out for massive retaliation in the form of cunningly Branded put-downs.
On a related note – Michael Winner is apparently very worried as he’s heard that someone’s taken out a Supper Injunction against him.
Sorry about that.
Posted by Eilidh on May 9, 2011
I don’t have much to comment except this blog is some sort of genius.
Best description of Katy Perry I’ve heard in a long time:
“a 26-year-old singer whose major cultural contribution so far has been to claim that California girls’ skin is so hot it is capable of melting one’s popsicle”
I can almost forgive you for using “totes” which I don’t mind as much as other stupid words such as “coinkydink”.
Posted by ChrisP on May 9, 2011
Oooo not blogging about other celebs are you Mark? It’ll be Frankie Boyle all over again!
Posted by Beth (Bloomability) on May 9, 2011
In other very vaguely related news, I found an article the other day about ‘innit’ making the scrabble word list. Totes worth a look if you haven’t heard already.
http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/uknews/8500975/Thang-innit-and-grrl-added-to-Scrabble-dictionary.html
(I couldn’t find the original article, but this was the first google result.)
Posted by Carl on May 9, 2011
Celebrity is a strange thing.
Without freaking you out, Mark, I had a dream last night that after a gig of yours you invited me on stage and, after a bit of banter between you and I, the night ended with us two and snooker veteran Jimmy White drunkenly singing Come On Eilleen to everyone I work with.
And I’ve not even met you or Jimmy.
Posted by Josie on May 9, 2011
“…she’s probably not the most talented person in her relationship, but that’s OK.”
That made me laugh a lot.
Posted by MusicalLottie on May 9, 2011
“I’m sure she’s perfectly nice and she probably doesn’t have the expectation that the world will just stop for her to have some chicken. But the world itself does have that expectation, and that’s what’s interesting and a bit bizarre.” – Yes, this expresses concisely exactly how I feel about most celebrities (unless we know for certain that they have that expectation themselves).
I actually think that the nature of fame can be rather unfair to those who unwittingly find themselves in the public eye due to actually being talented at whatever they do – it’s as if society forces fame and celebrity upon them, when they’d rather just get on and do their job in peace. Of course some embrace it, many accept it graciously, but some just don’t cope. It annoys me the way society sweeps people along because of what it wants, regardless of the individuals’ feelings.
[/End of rant that probably made no sense.]
Posted by Rachael on May 9, 2011
I read ‘totes’ and thought “you’ve changed Watson”. I’m glad you haven’t though.
Posted by Lizzy on May 9, 2011
Hahahaha. You’re so fearless – to me, at least. I’d be well worried about offending anyone ever if I was at all in the celebrity world (as well as just in my standard life). But you always just say it how it is. Totes funny.
Posted by Misha on May 9, 2011
You totes forgot.
Gosh I feel dirty now.