He likes to shoot his gun
Today, I crossed off a lifetime ‘first’ by firing a gun, lots of times. It was for the last of my sporting challenges in MW Kicks Off, and we were shooting at clay pigeons rather than, say, humans. And rather than being on mean streets, or in fact streets of any kind, we were in a muddy field with a helpful instructor saying things like ‘get your nose right down on the gun, don’t let your nose slip off it. But it’s still quite a feeling when you pull the trigger and hear the WUMPH as a shell goes shooting off into space. I believe WUMPH is what the experts call it.
It’s never been one of my ambitions, but undeniably, there was a moment as I pressed the gun against my shoulder when I thought, this is pretty cool. ‘Hey Mark, ever fired a gun?’ ‘Me? Oh, yeah. Yeah, I’ve packed a piece before now’. It’s a definite First for me. And this made me think about a blog maybe two months ago, called What Else Is New? In this, I challenged readers to say what new thing they’d done in 2010, and rashly offered a Toblerone to the best one. I read them all with fasincation, then forgot about it.
So here, very belatedly, is the result of the competition. I couldn’t separate two candidates. They were Sephy and Rhian. Sephy’s First was that, as a nurse, she had seen someone die for the first time this year. Rhian’s was that, at the age of 35, she had mashed up a banana for the first time, despite being a longtime bananaphobe. In their different ways these two people have demonstrated courage and resilience.
Accordingly, I am going to award them joint victory, which means that they will have to share the Toblerone laurels. This is going to take a bit of organising, which is, of course, a large part of the fun.
I will buy a Toblerone and put it in the hands of either Rhian or Sephy. Whichever it is must help themselves to half of the chocolate and then find a way of getting it to the other. This can be done directly, by meeting up, or by post, or by some sort of chain like the now-famous one which is conveying the iPod around Britain. I and other readers will help in whatever ways are necessary.
There’s no guarantee that either of these winners is still reading the blog – if they don’t come forward, I have some runners-up in mind. But in the meantime I shall wait hopefully for one or both to make themselves known. Then the fun will begin. And by plotting a Tobleronic journey I am confident each will achieve another First. A really stupid one, admittedly. But you know by now that doesn’t tend to stop me.
Posted by Suzanne on November 25, 2010
Great idea, Carl …
Suggest once a month would probably be more “do-able” …
We can spend the first few days … thinking! Next few days to a week … choosing! Further few days or weeks … setting it up! Last few days/hours/minutes … making it happen!!! Last seconds … cheering!!!
Go for it …
Warm wishes to everyone … I’d like winter to remain outside for me to look at and appreciate its beauty rather than creeping indoors and making me feel cold!!! x
Posted by ChrisP on November 25, 2010
Good to hear you’re still with us Carl! I like the idea of doing something new every month, sounds like fun if it’s affordable.
Posted by Tracey on November 25, 2010
Hi Mark. I’ve never fired a gun myself. I’d imagine it to be both scary and exhilirating at the same time.having recently watched one of my favourite movies concerning the late Mrs Ruth Ellis, I’d err on the side of scary although I think there’s still a lot to discover about that particular case. Regarding the Toblerone, I wonder. Would it be white, milk or dark? Or a box of mini sized ones containing all three? Hope you have a great day along with all other posters. Tracey x
Posted by Tibbs on November 25, 2010
I have never fired a gun. Closest I’ve ever come was archery at summer camp, and even then I didn’t want to shoot the fake bear target; it creeped me out too much. I think if I were given the opportunity to shoot a gun I wouldn’t be able to, for fear that I would somehow hit a person, despite all safety precautions. Still, it is a pretty cool thing to be able to say you’ve done.
Carl, that blog sounds like a great idea, and I’m glad you didn’t die!
As for the toblerone, unless the exchange occurs between Dec 10th and 22nd or somehow involves a side trip to Canada, I am afraid I will be unable to help, but as with the ipod I will enjoy hearing about it!
Posted by Misha on November 25, 2010
I’d imagine toblerone conveyancing would have issues with it going off. As has been highlighted. More of an adventure?
Interestingly, firing a gun is something I actually have done. God bless outward bound school trips, putting rifles into the hands of 11 year olds.
And finally. I like the idea Carl. That’s the best feedback I can give having dozed most of the way home from London.
Posted by Sam on November 24, 2010
I think Sephy hit the nail on the head: Toblerone passing will presumably have some kind of “once opened consume within a week” time limit, which would make the whole affair an awful lot more exciting. There could be a big countdown and everything.
Posted by Sephy on November 24, 2010
Rhian – not at all, it’s scarily routine in my job. I’ve experienced it again since (makes me sounds like a bit of a shit nurse tbh, doesn’t it? :/ ha) just the first time was a biggie. I went back and read your comment; I think the banana mashing is a very worthy winner
. You won’t catch me confronting my phobia (Beetles. URGH).
Carl – sounds like a great idea! I’m definetly in.
Posted by Anji on November 24, 2010
Thank goodness it’s now colder weather for chocolate passing! Could have gotten very messy.
I look forward to seeing developments! Also, with the festive season around the corner is it going to be a standard size toblerone or is there a supper sized version for the season?!
Posted by Kate B on November 24, 2010
Wow the idea of a toblerone chain sounds even more exciting! And a lot more challenging due to the temptation to have a piece, and the fact it would melt pretty easily. But then again, this is British winter so I think we’d be alright.
And to Carl’s comment, what a brilliant idea! I would be very up for reading your blog if you get round to writing it. Of course I wouldn’t give up on the Watson blog though
Posted by Rachel/Pandora on November 24, 2010
Right. I’ll be busy hiding under my bed until all discussions of another national handover scheme have passed…
Posted by Rhian on November 24, 2010
Hi Mark and Sephy, I’m still reading – I’ve managed every post so far (though not always on the published day). I’m not sure my banana wrangling is really a worthy winner, especially, Carl, given the lengths some people will go to to to do something for the first time!. I would be a very chuffed receipient of half a bar of toberlone (and in response to Meg’s conundrum, an odd number of pieces need not be a hinderance, the bar could be cut length ways, with the row of peaks as the cutting guide.) Although posting would probably be easiest it doesn’t really seem to be in the spirit of things around here, so some kind of crazy logistical problems is surely a must!
PS I had some ‘hilarious’ brush with death comments, but edited them out in sensitivity to Sephy’s first. I think she should get the whole bar really.
PS
Posted by Sephy on November 24, 2010
Also, I think firing a gun seems pretty cool as well. My brother had a BB gun when we were kids that I absolutely coveted and he knew it. Never let me have a go of it and would hide it when he went to bed. There’s this sport I watch sometimes on eurosport as well. It’s a mixture of cross country skiing and target practice :S It’s entrancing when you can’t sleep.
Ivan – I love seeing people chop wood (ooer). It’s kind of sexy, maybe it’s the risk of finger loss ha.
Come to think of it this is all a bit worrying…
Posted by Sephy on November 24, 2010
YAY! TOBLERONE! Thanks Mark
. i tink i mentioned before but I LOVE toblerone. Everything tastes better when its triangular haha.
I’m totally up for this. I hope it won’t take too long to get it from one of us to the other though, might not be very appetising if it’s been passed around the country for as long as that ipod has!
Posted by Carl on November 24, 2010
Thanks ShineUrShoes! Was a bit hairy for a moment.
So, do you think anyone would be up for my idea?
Posted by Hal on November 24, 2010
Went to Mark’s excellent show in Cheltenham on Tuesday. Attached is my view…of course I was directly behind a bald chap with a massive head. Who came in late. And laughed at the wrong times.
http://twitpic.com/39tskq
It’s a testament to the quality of the comedy that I still enjoyed the show!
Posted by ShineUrShoesGuv on November 24, 2010
Carl – I’m glad you didn’t get hurt by the bus! Good luck with the job hunt
Posted by Melanie on November 24, 2010
I went clay pigeon shooting with my dad and my uncle a few years ago. My uncle was amazingly accurate and barely had to aim before hitting them everytime, and my dad wasn’t much worse. I couldn’t hit the stupid things even when my uncle propped one up againt a bale of straw for me, AND I had a lighter gun in a 20 bore shotgun rather than a 12 bore! It was good fun though!
Posted by MusicalLottie on November 24, 2010
Ooh, I can arch … sort of … but I’m not sure I’d be too keen to fire a gun. I know there’d be all sorts of safety in place as with archery (possibly more so) but I just can’t help but think that a non-fatal gunshot wound would do so much more damage than a non-fatal arrow wound and I don’t think I could trust myself not to bottle it and do something dangerously wrong.
Anyway … in summary, well done Mark! That’s a pretty cool thing to have done.
Posted by Kay (of Project Preston fame) on November 24, 2010
My ‘first’ for this year was giving birth to my son – It gave me a new found respect for all mums out there! As for guns, the closest I have got to is the ones on Golden Eye which my sister and I used to play on the N64 – and now she has just got it for the Wii too – so much shooting fun to be had over Xmas this year!
Posted by Rachael on November 24, 2010
I tried to fire a gun at a target thing before on one of those annoying ‘team building’ days but I was so bad at it that the instructor man asked if I could see without glasses. I don’t wear glasses I just had no idea what he was trying to tell me to do.
Posted by Megan on November 24, 2010
I fired many guns at my former boss’s retirement party (he was only 40, but was retiring from the cinema). He had joked about going to the firing range for the office Christmas party for YEARS, but the owner always said no.
I was terrible at firing the handguns, but pretty decent at trap shooting. I think I got 4 out of 5 each time.
I also have vague memories of my father teaching me to fire a hunting rifle at a paper target nailed to the side of a disused barn at the old family farm. He died when I was five years old, so I must have been four at the time since it was snowy when we did this. No lie, but I suspect that this might have been because we had a bear problem up at the ranch, so teaching gun skills and safety were very important.
(This farm/ranch was by this point a family cottage – we lived in the city. I am descended from frontiersy people, but I am most definitely not one.)
Posted by Kathryn on November 24, 2010
Oh, I’ve had so many good “firsts” since that original blog. I can’t remember what I came up with for the sake of entering the competition, but I’ve definitely had better ones since.
If there was another mad plan for a toblerone journey akin to the iPod challenge I’d be in a better position to help this time- no flights would be involved.
Carl’s idea sounds really interesting.
Posted by heatherooo on November 24, 2010
Well done, guys. This Tobleronic journey sounds immense. Nice.
As an aside, I’ll be singing In Bloom by Nirvana for the rest of the day. Whether this is a good or bad thing, is as yet undetermined.
Posted by Meg on November 24, 2010
How many pieces are there in a Toblerone? Could get a bit tricky if there are an odd number of pieces.
Posted by Carl on November 24, 2010
Sorry for typos
Posted by Carl on November 24, 2010
Well done guys!
If this question was posed this week I would have said: “For the first time in my life I genuinely almost died.”
Honestly. A bus hit my foot as I dived and forward rolled out of the way of it after stumbling ing the middle of a road.
It was very scary and I am so, so pleased to still be here.
It’s got me thinking (and this blog prompted me to put this) about setting up something. This is terribly vague, I know. But I want to set up some kind of a blog that will encourage people to do one thing they’ve never done before a every week, fortnight, or month (nor decided yet) and record it on said blog.
Would any Watsonians be up for this? And if I set it up, would any of you spread the word?
Sorry to use your blog as a platform to speak to more people, Mark. But do you think you could help?
It sounds very Hollywood, but nearly being squished has opened my eyes a bit to the fact I’m not where I want to be in life. Already I’ve updated my CV and gone on the hunt for a rewarding job in a charity and a job in a great love of mine, football. Either would be great.
Anyway, give me a couple of days and I’ll sort something out.
Just thought it would be something Watsonians may go with.
Posted by Ivan (@ivanbrett) on November 24, 2010
Ooh, I’ve never fired a gun. I don’t think it’s something I’d like though. It’s like chopping wood – every time I take a hack I just think “ooh, imagine if my finger was under there.” I can’t help it. What a fool I be.