Cheer up Deborah
Today was tough work after another monstrous night of crying (mostly, but not exclusively, by Kit). I did an enormous bunch of interviews, most of them on the phone while pushing the now asleep baby around. It dawned on me after I’d asked you all for funny words to include that these interviews were mostly not going out live on the radio, so it would be a bit of a waste to slip them in. Instead, I’ll hang onto them and we can all have a good chortle when I utter them during an interview that everyone can hear. If I say your word it’s worth a point, in Watson’s Words. This is not the same game as Where’s Watson.
I did an advert with Dawn French. I played the voice of a stupid cat. She played a more enlightened cat. Dawn French was even better than you would wish for Dawn French to be. We did some quasi-sexual banter and were given Chomp bars by the advert people. I suppose you’d have to class this as a very good experience. It shows that optimism is very often justified, because if you’d asked me a few months ago what the likelihood was of my eating a Chomp bar with Dawn French, I would have said ‘rather low’. And I would have been WRONG.
However, we all know optimism is much more easily espoused than put into action – that’s one of the recurring themes of this blog – and as recently as, say, 3.30am, starved of sleep and listening to a dismayed baby, I would happily have swapped lives with a pot-bellied pig if given the opportunity. Sometimes we all need a bit of perking up. So today, even though I need to get various other things done soon like a run-down of people’s world-changing efforts, I wanted to devote the blog to a reader, Deborah. Yesterday she wrote:
Well my optimism went out the window too. Today I’ve been told I’m being made redundant – even as a hopeless optimist finding it hard to see the positive side of that.
Sorry to start the comments on ‘a downer’ but that’s reality for you.
This is, obviously, dreadful.
Deborah is a good sort who once identified some plants for me on this blog, and regularly leaves nice Comments, and doesn’t like football but we still seem to get on.
It seems a bit lame for me to say ‘cheer up, Deborah! Sure you’ll get another job! Here is a story about someone I know who was made redundant and then things picked up!’ and so forth… BUT if a lot of us did it, it might just make her feel, if not substantially better, at least marginally.
So, whether you have any experience of being laid off or know someone who has been, or have no relevant experience at all but just goodwill, please leave a supportive Comment below and this blog will function as a sort of group hug for our sad member. Boosting both her level of optimism, and the general morale in the camp (because it feels good to be good to people, as we all know). And thereby topping up the overall optimism which this blog is all about.
Unless she doesn’t read the blog today. But fingers crossed…
Posted by Katy on July 28, 2010
I know I’m a bit late on this one and Deborah seems to be in surprisingly good fettle about it all, but I’ve been made redundant a couple of times.
The first time was the worse, I moved to London for the job and less than 12 months later they were shutting the office. I got a lovely package from them, but sadly it was so nice a package that I didnt think I really needed to look for work and as such spent 3 months not really doing anything and being a bit dull. It contributed to the end of my then relationship. Well that and The Wedding Present. And a dead cat.
Posted by Laura on July 25, 2010
I was made redundant a few months ago. At first I quite liked not having to work, what with me being inherently lazy. Still, money was tight and I needed a job. Getting turned away from job after job for being too qualified/not qualified enough is totally soul-destroying so I feel your pain. Three weeks ago I started a nice new job in a school, working with lots of lovely people, and, being in a school, I get lots of holiday every year so still get the chance to be lazy. It’s not the job I wanted to do, it’s not where I saw my career going, but it’s a job and definitely has its benefits.
I won’t say anything so glib as ‘something better will come along’, but something different will. I would offer hugs but I don’t hug strangers – even virtual hugs. How about a firm handshake and a pat on the back? Good luck with it all.
Posted by Anji on July 24, 2010
I’m adding another hug in the pot! Sometimes it takes something like this to tip life upside down and make it somehow turn into a positive!
Lifes path can be very strange at times. Optimism all the way!
Posted by Wooz on July 24, 2010
For Deborah: I’m an HR person who has both spent a lot of my time making people redundant and have myself been made redundant last year, (in fact just a few months after my mother’s death – every time I told myself it couldn’t get worse, it did…..) all I can say is that yeah, it sucks, but it will be fine. As trite as it sounds, it is an opportunity to try something new, something different, something better. If I can in any way assist you, get Mark to pass on my e-mail address. BTW, for me, last year was 6 or 7 months of yukkiness, since new year my life has been full of lovely people, both old and new, a fab new job and a lot of shiny stuff – the same positivity will happen to you, honest – keep smiling
Posted by Manchester United Fan on July 24, 2010
I am being made redundant too. Seeing it as an opportunity to find something better. Sometimes you need a shove to get of your arse and do things. It will be for the best, hopefully.
Posted by ChrisP on July 24, 2010
Looking for jobs and applying for jobs is one of the most soul destroying and self-esteem erasing processes I have been through. I didn’t get a reply from most of the CVs I posted. It’s just misrible but everybody has to do it at some point. That will be crap and there is no way round it. But there is no doubt a company out there who needs YOU!
BUT in the meantime keep busy. Firstly, you will go mad with all your free time (if you’re anything like me), so take up as many hobbies and volunteering opportunities and follow up as many interests or play as many instruments as you can. Somebody who has filled a few redundant months helping a cause they like, being part of a working team, reaching some kind of target and showing enthusiasm will do as much good for you job hunting as it will do for your own motivation. So keep busy.
As everybody else has pointed out, your situation can turn for the better potentially faster than it turned for the worse. I’ve finished my week far better than I started it and in a way I would have dared not imagine. So who knows.
But do let us know how the job hunting goes
Posted by Sue (but not the same Sue as at the bottom of the page) on July 24, 2010
My short comment with a link to my blog went to moderation and was eaten by cyberspace, so here I go again. This time it will be longer as my last attempt was submitted early due to answering the door. You have been warned.
Deborah: I took voluntary redundancy in January this year. It was a scary thing to do after over ten years with the same company, but there were cut-backs to be made and our jobs were going overseas. Admin would be cut from eight to 2.5 people. Yes that’s right, two and a half people in the Australian office, and one of those people would be the receptionist. I decided to jump before I was pushed, but as it turned out only one person decided to stay and they had to look for one and a half people elsewhere.
Anyway, after at least a year of worrying about what was going to happen with our jobs, knowing my job was going to be redundant was actually quite liberating. Whe the time came to leave, I decided I was too frazzled to look for work straight away, so I took a month off before I even started to look for work. When I found work, it was still less than two months after my redundancy.
The job I’m doing now is only temporary, but that suits me right now because I’ve decided I want more time off next year to do fun stuff before I get too old and my health decides what I can and can’t do.
My new job is further away from home, but much more varied than my old job was. I can honestly say that I’m doing things now that I didn’t think I was capable of when I was in my old rut. Don’t get me wrong, I loved my old rut. But now I can see that changing course in life is not always a bad thing. It’s just different, and sometimes it can be better… And I know it’s a cliche but it’s true when they say that when one door closes another one opens. I thought I wanted another ’safe’ permanent full-time job. But now my goal posts have moved, because I’ve done something else; my horizons have broadened and my plans have changed. But I’m digressing now.
Deborah, the point is this; YOU are not redundant. The job is redundant, You are perfectly able to get another job; it’s a numbers game. Tell everyone you are available and get your CV updated.
You have some ’self-improvement’ to do, it’s just in an area that was not on your original TYSIC list.
Posted by Adele on July 24, 2010
I was made redundant from my job a couple of days after recovering from Pneumonia and it was not a good feeling. I spent some time getting my CV together and applying for jobs, and found something shortly after. I also had the good fortune of my old employer phoning me at my new job asking me to come back. Imagine the joy of being able to say “get stuffed”.
My advice is to always keep going, take stock of the positives and use the downtime to do as much as possible (volunteering to keep yourself busy or similar). I did this and my new employer commented at how impressed they were that I’d filled my time constructively.
Good luck to you Deborah, we’re all rooting for you.
Posted by Lydia on July 24, 2010
I’m a bit useless with this stuff, and I don’t really have any stories. *hugs* and I hope that it is all for the best. I’m you’ll find a job that is waaay better. xx
Posted by Al Kennedy on July 24, 2010
(And on the subject, as I see below, of YouTube clips that always make you smile, here’s one of comedian/talk show host Craig Ferguson and two of his crew lip-syncing to a Michael Franti song, with a load of puppets: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ULW2h_TK2Ik )
Posted by Al Kennedy on July 24, 2010
Deborah,
I was laid off in October 2008. I was gutted – the way that I’d been told the redundancy process would go would have left me still in that same job, and the way they actually did it in practice ended up with me the only person in my department being made redundant.
I did a bit of temping for a little while and managed to get a new permanent job about three months later, doing something substantially similar to what I had been doing before but with a wider scope, so I now actually have broader experience than I would have had at my old job (where they’ve now fired almost everyone else in the department, so if I’d managed to hang on, then I would have been looking for a job in my particular area at the same time as all my co-workers were).
It isn’t an easy thing to deal with (I was pretty despondent a lot of the time while I was looking for a job, and even now I have a constant niggling paranoia that I’ll be made redundant from this job) but the only thing I can say is that it isn’t forever. You will get through this! Remember that many people you know will have lost their job at some point and will be able to sympathise with you, and your friends and family are good people to talk to about this. You don’t have to struggle through it alone.
Posted by JontyLarr on July 24, 2010
It’s not technically redundancy but I recently got released from a job through no fault of my own. Having finally put my degree to use to get a job in a solicitors, they took just 10 days, 4 of which my main employer wasn’t in, to come to the conclusion that they’d made a mistake creating the role and that there was no time to train me sufficiently. I’d left a full time secure job to take the role. It’s horrible being 22, a well-educated and verbose individual, and have nothing to say other than “IT’S NOT FAIR, IT’S NOT FAIR, IT’S NOT FAIR!” I’m not much of an optimist, I’ve not made the commitment to being. It’s a horrible time to lose a job. What is true, though is that you’ll never break. However hard it gets, you won’t break and it will get better. Things always work out. For the best? Who knows, but they DO work out. For me, the amazingly generous spirit I received from my 10-day colleagues made the experience somewhat worthwhile. These were people I didn’t know and had no reason to be so nice to me, but they were, and it made me feel better about the world. Hopefully you can find something positive from the experience.
On an unrelated note, I think we should all come up with odd scenarios a la eating a chomp with Dawn French, and see if Mark’s positive enough to believe that they could happen. Anyone who gets one right gets a Where WILL Watson Be? point. Who’s in?
I’ll start the ball rolling with juggling with Alexei Sayle.
Posted by Louise on July 24, 2010
Hello deborah, at only 20 when it happened it wasnt as scary as someone who had to pay bills or what not but one time I showed up to work and the place had shut down. I didnt get rudancy pay or any sort of warning even though I had been working there for three years as a supervisor. Anyways, I decided to apply for uni and thats what I am doing the now. Sometimes it makes you take a detour but in my case it worked out for the best and I am sure it will for you too. Good luck.
Posted by LisaD on July 24, 2010
Hi Deborah, A) here’s another virtual hug. B) Being unemployed sucks hard, but optimism can fix it. A friend of mine got laid off the day our favorite news anchor announced that there are 5 people applying for each available job in the US of A right now. She refers to it as her “artistic sabbatical” and is using the time she isn’t applying for work and updating her CV to do all the actor stuff she didn’t have time for when she was working 12 hours a day as a paralegal, auditioning for plays and preparing monologues and so forth. I’ve spent most of my unemployed time writing, going to the gym (a luxury I NEVER had time for) and training for a new career. I hated every second of my last job; change–even when it led to being broke–is AWESOME.
Posted by Sue (but not the same Sue as on the second comment) on July 24, 2010
Hi Deborah, I was made redundant in January this year, I made it my plan to have a month off as I felt a bit frazzled. Then I started to look for work, and I got a casual job in March and I’m still there. At this stage I think I’ll be there for a long time.
It is a good idea to write about your experience, it always helps me clarify things when I write them down. Here, is my blog.
http://growingupoptional.wordpress.com/2010/03/19/a-new-start/
Posted by Rachel/Pandora on July 24, 2010
*hug* for you Deborah. It proper sucks. I have no words of wisdom on the subject, but I can share a happy YouTube video that always makes me smile – http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Dsg8JccRZCw
x
Posted by Madeleine on July 24, 2010
Hi Deborah, I don’t have any experience with redundancy so all I can offer is best wishes and positive thoughts to you. I really hope that this opens up some kind of other oportunities and it’s great to hear that you’re already using it to sort some stuff out.
Looking forward to hearing the (surely brilliant) chapters to come.
Posted by MusicalLottie on July 24, 2010
DUH if I’d, y’know, actually read the post properly, I would have seen that last night wasn’t better. Sorry about that. I still hope Kit’s soon better.
*hangs head in shame*
Posted by Kate W on July 24, 2010
My friend was made redundant after 11 years with his company and it’s actually worked out fantastically well. He adored the job and wouldn’t have chosen to leave, but it was ridiculously stressful (to the point where he was taking beta blockers to be able to go into the office) and at one stage he had 12 line managers. He was gutted when they made him redundant, but it gave the push to leave and start freelancing. He’s now working from home with a laptop and his cat, doing about half the hours he was before but for very similar money, and having a much much nicer life.
I haven’t been made redundant, but did have my contract not renewed at a week’s notice just before Christmas two years ago. Bit of a shock at the time, but it’s worked out fine. I spent a little while not working, but rather enjoying being incredibly cheap and having time to potter about watching Columbo and baking gingerbread, then got a job that’s less stupid than my old job with a much faster commute.
So have some relevant experience, and goodwill, and a virtual hug. Glad you’re still feeling optimistic!
(Mark – this may not be at all helpful, but my friends said the best thing that happened to them when their daughter was tiny was reading a baby book that basically said “Your baby is going to cry. And cry and cry. You’re not doing anything wrong and they’re OK; that’s just what’s going to happen.”. Didn’t stop the actual crying in any way, but they said made them feel a lot better than it was a) normal and b) wasn’t going to go on forever.)
Posted by MusicalLottie on July 24, 2010
Deborah, it’s great to hear you are looking at it so positively.
I was unemployed for 2 1/2 years before getting my first (and to date, only) job – and it was because I’d been unemployed for over 6 months that I was sent for the interview. It is an amazing job; unfortunately I have to leave when my contract ends, but it has been so much better than I could have imagined. I’ve gained friends, experience, and confidence that I wouldn’t have, had I been employed to start with! So hopefully your next job will be better than you imagine – and employers ought to be impressed by your positivity. If they’re not, they don’t deserve you!
Mark, how lovely of you to write this blog post for Deborah! Glad to hear last night was better, and meeting Dawn French sounds fun
Posted by Laurs on July 23, 2010
Deborah, I can’t offer any experience in this, so please instead accept this virtual hug, cup of tea and a big bar of whatever your favourite chocolate is.
Take care.
Posted by Someone on July 23, 2010
Ah Deborah your optimistic thinking is brilliant and right, of course :] I hope everything works out for you and am sure it will (see: I’m being optimistic too now. It spreads!)
I’m not a hugger but you may have a virtual one for the pot :].
[Dawn French! Very jealous. I want your life, Mark!]
Posted by LisaBrunders on July 23, 2010
Hi Deborah I’m sending you hugs.
Posted by DeborahF on July 23, 2010
Oh Mark – yea of little faith – of course I’m reading the blog today. I read it every day like many others even climbing a hill every evening whilst on holiday in the Lake District, to get a 3G signal
Thanks for all your kind wishes and virtual hugs – I definitely need lots of hugs at the moment. Though it’s difficult to read through the tears – because people saying nice things to me / about me always makes me cry.
I’ve already started writing my CV and listing all the stuff I need to sort out my finances. I suspect my income will reduce so much I’ll probably have to sell my house.
However, that’s ok I don’t really like living in Derby anyway. So yes, it’s an opportunity to change my life in so many ways – in fact my TYSIC was to learn to embrace change – I never thought I’d have such an ideal opportunity to complete it! All I’ve got to do is to make my mind up on what I want to do next with my life :s
So thanks to Mark for devoting your blog to cheering me up – it means a lot to me. Thanks again to my fellow blog readers for all your kind words. I hope to be telling you all about my new and hopefully exciting life
PS I’m going to start by blogging about this episode of my life and will post a link soon.
PPS You see you can’t keep an eternal optimist down for long
Posted by Corey on July 23, 2010
I should point out that I’m not saying you shouldn’t be upset or down about redundancy…..of course you should its terrible ……..but as soon as you get another job you may just find some great friends there and that would never have been possible without this happening!?!
Hopefully all these wonderful people offering you support will give you a lift!!
Posted by Kathryn on July 23, 2010
*hugs*
I can’t say I’ve been there (I haven’t had a job yet) but it will get better. And in the meantime have some cake.
Posted by Anna on July 23, 2010
I hope you find a new job really soon Deborah, and I also hope that knowing that there’s a little corner of the internet wishing you well makes things slightly less crap for you. Have a virtual hug (even though I don’t normally do that kind of thing).
(Oh, and Mark, if it’s any consolation, my small person went from waking up every 3 hours to sleeping through the night (10 hours at a stretch) at a year old. Which probably seems like a long time to wait right now, but it will happen. You will sleep again, one day.)
Posted by Maddie on July 23, 2010
Deborah, smile, because I’m sure that you have a lot of other wonderful things to be happy about, although I may not be able to specify what they are, I’m sure they are there.
I don’t really know where I happen to stand on everything happening for a reason or anything like that, but I do think that when things happen that aren’t particularly brilliant, being down about it doesn’t do much other than keep you in a bad mood for longer and won’t change anything. So instead of spending your time being down about something you have no control over, be happy and excited for whatever may happen next, as you never know, it could just be great!
In the meantime, Have a nice cup of tea and a biscuit.
(Sorry if this isn’t much help)
Big Hugs xx
Posted by Josh on July 23, 2010
To cheer you up I can think of no better thing to say than
“Ooh Eee Ooh Ahh Ahh Ting Tang Walla Walla BingBang.”
Posted by Andy on July 23, 2010
I can’t honestly say I know how you feel Deborah because I’ve been massively lucky in my working life and never had to face redundancy. I have, however, changed jobs quite a few times which on the one hand makes my CV look slighlty schizophrenic but on the other hand means I can now turn my hand to a fair variety of different jobs. So, the only advice I can practically offer would be to not pigeon-hole yourself and try and be flexible about future employment as you never know what doors it may lead to. Best of luck!
Posted by Hannah Mae on July 23, 2010
Lots of hugs to Deborah. My dad was made redundant a couple of years ago from a hotshot city job. It was pretty terrible – we had to move house and he got horribly depressed. But now he’s self-employed and much in demand in a little village that he loves. He used to hate the commute but now he can work from the garden, isn’t answerable to yuppie twats and has loads of time to spend with his friends and family. Basically, things will get better. I know everyone must be telling you that right now and it’s difficult to believe, but hang in there. Enjoy your time away from work – identify as many plants as you can! – because you’ll be back in no time.
What a nice blog entry, Mark. And how jealous I am of your Chomp-eating-with-Dawn-French anecdote!
Posted by Linsey on July 23, 2010
Here’s a no-experience-naive-but-well-meaning comment – that’s a really terrible thing to happen to anybody, let alone the lovely people from here. Hope everything goes alright for you.
I know this doesn’t help at all, but I couldn’t just read this and not leave a comment!
Posted by Rachael on July 23, 2010
Cheer up Deborah, I’m sure you’ll get another job, maybe one that involves identifying plants. I hope things pick up for you soon
Posted by Aislinn on July 23, 2010
My boyfriend used to work at HSBC in Southend, where he lives, and earlier this year was told that, come March, he’d be made redundant. Obviously this was fairly stressful news and he, explicably, took it pretty badly.
A week or before his redundancy (and a lot of rejected job applications later) he was offered a job in a HSBC in London. He earns more money and, when he’s saved up enough to afford it, is thinking of moving out of his parents’ house and into a place in London with his two bandmates – something he’s been keen on for a while.
Oh, also – my Dad was made redundant twice in the space of six months. He worked a lot in bookshops and after the second redundancy decided to use what he had learnt to start up his own company, buying second hand books and selling them online for a profit. So now he’s self employed, has a job he loves and works, to an extent, as and when he likes.
I’d hate to make this sound really simple and like it’s nothing to worry about, but I’d say being a) proactive and b) as positive as you can manage both help. Clouds/silver linings etc.
Posted by Corey on July 23, 2010
Deborah, sorry o hear your news….its a horrible horrible thing to do to somebody, but heres my redundancy related stories.
At the firm I work for 4 people were let go just before last Christmas, which is surely one of the worst times to be let go!?, well, all 4 by the new year had found new and by all accounts better jobs!.
But my main story is that of my Uncle who worked at a firm for 20 or so years before being one of the employees who suffered when some American company bought them out. He had a family to support and all he knew was the trade he was in which was something to do with Cement mixers….well certainly cement related anyway. He never once gave up and turned it into an opportunity to do something new, got a job at a bank…..which he loves, and about 15 years later is still going strong, cycling to work everyday in his 60′s, still refereeing Sunday league football games on the weekend and just generally not letting other peoples decisions affect him.
Yes its horrible but another chapter beckons!….good luck
Posted by Megan on July 23, 2010
In my second year of university, I had three jobs. I lost two in the space of week through no REAL fault of my own. One was because the video store shut down (my boss was useless, so we all kinda knew it was coming, but I didn’t expect to come to work and be sent home) and the second (at an afterschool arts program) was because I got into a co-op program (basically a work study thing) starting in January (this was in late October) and my boss said “you might as well leave now, since I have to train someone before Christmas anyway”. (The third job was a babysitting gig once a week and didn’t exactly pay for my life.)
I liked both jobs, but I really was better off without them. At the time, I was practically despondant and I really screwed up my studies (even more than when I had three jobs – the video store was dead during the day, so there wasn’t much work involved, but a lot of studying). In the long run, it was for the best, though I didn’t realise it at the time. The work placements were my first ‘grown-up’ jobs, paid me to write about history (some of my stuff is still up on the Parks Canada website), and made me realise that I haaaaaated the bureaucracy of working in the public service, so I learned a helluva lot.
So, DeborahF, I wish you the very, very best, as well as the commiserations of someone who has been there.
Posted by Sue on July 23, 2010
Ooh, I got first comment!
I am in awe of the recording of an advert/chomp eating with Dawn French – was this for innocent Smoothies again? And, following on from the excellent blog on chuggers and charity… will you be participating in innocent Smoothies Big Knit??
Suggestions for Watson’s Words: Globule. Not funny, but it’s a satisfying word to say. Or Piffle. That one makes a good alternative swear word.
Hope you sleep well for once, Mr Watson
Posted by Sue on July 23, 2010
*hugs to Deborah*
Just back off holiday and catching up with the blog – I’ve been persuading my friends to follow it too, I was saying how personal it feels and how it’s like a little close-knit community. This just shows it.
The positive side is evidently getting a Watson blog dedicated to you – and a better job at the end of it. The lows make the highs seem even better. All the best