Pillow talk
My thoughts on the countryside yesterday (the countryside, in this case, being a few plants in the garden of my hotel) provoked a typically balanced set of comments in favour of greenery or nasty dirty old roads (my personal favourite). It goes without saying that any opinions I express here are pretty frivolous and not meant to upset anyone with the contrary opinion, and indeed, it was a pleasure to hear from some country-loving folk. The most authoritative of these, and the only one to really rise to my challenge of naming some plants you couldn’t see, was Deborah Fern. This is a serious countryphile: she owns a shepherd’s crook, hopes to marry a farmer, and even has ‘Fern’ as her name. In case you missed it, she wrote:
So to your surroundings – the purple flowers if shaped like a pompom are probably alliums (a member of the onion family). I’d say the climber is either a clematis or perhaps a Virginia creeper. The bush with blue flowers probably a ceanothus (see-an-o-this). The red leaved tree will be an acer japonica. So is there a prize for this?
Yes, after that, I think there should be. What do you want, Deborah? (Terms and conditions apply.)
Among yesterday’s other impressive contributions was a proposal by Corey for a game-show called ‘Britain’s Got Tarrant’ in which the ‘Millionaire’ host, whom I worked with not so long ago, is kidnapped each week. I will work on getting this commissioned, although perhaps it’s not the best time for me to approach the BBC…
Thanks for all the messages about We Need Answers. All of our few, loyal viewers are highly valued by us (Key, Watson and Horne). To be h0nest it was not a big shock as we knew BBC4 was being shaken up and made to cut its ‘quirky comedy’ quota, which basically means us. In a sense it was a brave decision for them to make it in the first place. The only shame is that nearly everyone who watched it seemed to like it, and a lot of them REALLY liked it; the show’s being axed because there just weren’t enough of them – and if you get rid of shows on that basis, virtually no show on a digital channel wouldever have survived its first series. Plus, the BBC themselves have the power to determine ratings by doing trailers and press and so on, and they didn’t really bother doing that with We Need Answers; instead they promoted shows that were already huge. So you end up with a catch-22 where the show can’t really catch on till more people hear about it, but they’re not allowed to hear about it until it has caught on. It’s similar to the way sometimes families put all their energies into helping the golden boy who’s already sorted, and leave the black sheep to struggle more and more.
But I’m grateful the BBC ever gave it a chance in the first place, and we will almost certainly do more live We Need Answers in the future. And continue to play No More Women, the spin-off game, which you can find online.
(Respectful silence.)
Tonight I did a preview show in what I can only call a school hall, in Ashford. On the whole, it was quite good. There are two months until the show goes to Edinburgh, and then it will be out on tour. During these times, the blog may become worryingly negative on occasion, depending on how things are going. But at the very least it should be quite lively reading.
I haven’t said anything of note today, I do apologise. It’s fair to say the blog is more interesting when I actually choose a subject, like yesterday. But sometimes it really is all I can do to just chat to you for a while, like this. The way I might if you were a single person and we were travelling home together. And we were going to have a cup of tea and then curl up in bed. Night night.
Posted by wanye on July 21, 2011
argh! i just found out about WNA via an aside on a chortle news page
sure WNA is the sort of thing bbc4 needs? and without bbc4, we would be left with the populist rubbish of bbc3, some of us like our comedy a little better than gavin and sodding stacy, and since bbc3 stopped doing interesting stuff a few years ago, it was left to bbc4 to pick up the slack.
BOO TO THE BEEB!
Posted by Knox on July 8, 2011
They’re always axing the good stuff – stupid BBC.
(many have possibly already asked this, but) any chance of any live WNA at any point?
Posted by Someone on June 7, 2010
This is horrible news. We Need Answers is of course (I’m not sure why of course, but definitely of course) one of my favourite shows and goes a long way to why I love BBC 4.. the Beeb better carry on being good in other ways. If i ever get my job there… ooh it’d be brilliant. And you would be rich! (Maybe I shouldn’t get a job there…)
Yay for more live versions though!
Posted by Tony Cowards on June 7, 2010
Mark, I think “We Need Answers” was cancelled by the BBC because when you say it fast it sounds like “Weeny Dancers” and viewers were disappointed that it didn’t feature people of restricted growth gyrating to disco music, I know I was.
Posted by Al Kennedy on June 7, 2010
I wrote a Stern Email Of Complaint to the BBC about the cancellation of We Need Answers, but I’m not sure how much effect such things have. At least they know now, I suppose, that one more viewer is annoyed and disappointed in them.
Posted by Corey on June 6, 2010
I’m glad you liked my game show idea. I don’t want to be fussy but lets stay clear of ITV, they’ll ruin it by getting Paddy McGuiness or Vernon Kay to present it!.
I’m a city loving person, nothing quite like arriving at NYC or Vegas at night, or flying over the Opera house…..stunning.
Having said that, from where I live I can be out in the Peak District in 10 mins in total solitude……which is beautiful in its own way.
Posted by Beth on June 5, 2010
Wait…what? We Need Answers was cancelled? I must have missed it in the last blog- I have a bad habit of reading too fast and missing important bits in books just so I can get to the end as quickly as possible. I am quite sad now
Television is just getting crapper and crapper these days. They cancel something awesome like WNA and then make dozens of crappy comedy/drama/sitcom things that only ever last a couple of series because it gets so boring. We need a petition!
Posted by Dawn on June 5, 2010
Mark, how did you and the lovely Mrs Watson decide on the name Kit for your baby boy?
My eldest Son Matthew was named after Sir Matt Busby. His father was such a huge fan, when I arrived home from the Maternity Ward, tiny bundle in my arms the cot was painted red and white stripes! (There were fairy lights draped around it though which was quite sweet).
Laura was next and I had chosen the name Amy but because my mum loved the name Laura and it was her first Grandaughter I let her choose. It was the perfect choice because the name suits her 100%.
Then Amycool was born and I was thrilled to use my favourite name.
I love the name Amy because old ladies are called Amy and new babies are called Amy.
Lastly Liam Scott! I chose Liam because it was very unusual 21 years ago (Liam Gallagher was still at High School and unknown)!
The Scott bit came from a character in “Neighbours”, Scott Robinson played by Jason Donovan!
So, Mark I’d love to know how you both chose Kit.
Posted by Mark on June 5, 2010
Why was the Saturday show cancelled, we were looking forward to it?
Posted by Kate W on June 5, 2010
(Really more applicable to yesterday’s blog, but….) Nothing wrong at all with preferring cities (I do too), but should you ever feel the urge to appreciate the countryside more, I suspect Alex Horne would be an excellent place to start. He’s certainly well up on avian life, if not flora.
You’re absolutely right about the Catch 22 that is broadcasting; programmes don’t get promoted till they’re popular, but won’t be popular (especially on digital channels) without promotion. I think most commissioning decisions are a mystery to the majority of the audience, really. But I’m very glad we got the series and a half of We Need Answers that we did, and will hope to see it again live some time soon – I did love the live show.
And you just chatting is nice.
Posted by Rachael on June 5, 2010
Sort of TYSIC update: I saw some goats today, and i think i successfully identified their breeds.
Posted by Ally on June 5, 2010
I would very much have liked to have seen We Need Answers. But I never did since I live in another country. Despite this I am sad to hear that you are no longer making it. It’s always sad when good comedy shows get axed by networks.
Posted by Paige on June 5, 2010
Thanks for the great show yesterday – I’m glad the sixty-seven year old survived through your show and hope you come back to Ashford in the future (yeah, probably not, let’s be honest).
Still trying to think what could look like a lemon but not be a lemon. Damn it.
Posted by Joshua on June 5, 2010
It’s a real shame about We Need Answers but hopefully it’ll be around in the future nonetheless.
The main reason to comment is to thank you for performing last night and doing so bloody well despite the problems, which were quite easily overcome.
A good topic might be photo manipulation – and whether or not we can find the existence of such a top as in that poster?!
Posted by Zoe on June 5, 2010
I’m hoping that you might find Edinburgh is just a little bit easier this year now that you have the TYSIC back up squad. Go team! Mind you if you feel like a bloody good moan you can do that too xx.
Posted by Anji on June 5, 2010
I fell asleep early last night and missed this! Although I too was worried about the milk. I’m guessing it was either a good mornin in the Watson house and milk was had, or you made your drinks in a sleepy fashion, stumbled to the fridge to then remember what you needed to get!
We need answers will indeed be missed, how can shows like, best home videos from 1990, always get shown and not ones like yours!
Loving the idea of a whole Watson tv channel! It brings the idea of the scene in hackers, when they over take the tv station. That would be fun!
I’m off to spend the afternoon dressed as a ladybug at a 3 year olds party. I know it’s still before 10 (just) but I’m building myself up for it!
Posted by Ivan on June 5, 2010
We’ll just have to all come and see ‘We Need Answers’ on tour. Looking forward to it immensely. Maybe, with enough support and a successful UK tour, the BBC might reconsider…
Posted by h2osarah on June 5, 2010
I just curled up in bed when I remembered to read this blog. And it feels like a friendly chat at the end of a day. I’m all warm and fuzzy inside now.
Posted by (Magnificent) Josh on June 5, 2010
How much does a TV Channel cost? I reckon we could scrape it together and make “WTF” The Watsonian Transmission Frequency. On it would be Mark Watson. If we run out of programs we could just put a picture of his face on it for hours and hours.
Patrick is telling me I should go to bed now.
Posted by (Magnificent) Josh on June 5, 2010
Don’t think you can get away with those 0s by the way, you’re no match for my sneaky eyes.
Posted by Maddy on June 5, 2010
I too will miss, We Need Answers. This is just my opinion but is the BBC making really bad decisions about what they do not broadcast, like We Need Answers (its a travesty its going) and the BBC radio 6 palava. I hope they will see sense soon.
cheers for the ultra snazzy blog!
night x
Posted by DeborahF on June 5, 2010
Hurrah – that’s the second prize I’ve won lately though the signed snooker cue I won the other week is a bit of a white elephant. As I couldn’t even sell it on Ebay and I thought anything would sell on Ebay
So to my request for a prize … ooh this is difficult for someone who is basically indecisive… Nope – it’s no good I haven’t got a clue so surprise me. Send me something completely random – perhaps something from a show or anything you’ve ‘borrowed’ from a hotel in the past
Posted by Sam on June 5, 2010
Well if we’re doing a brief recap of our days:
I had an exam after next to no sleep, handing in some essays to slightly delay my failure of university, had lunch, wasted an afternoon, got horribly depressed about the fact that my life has nothing in it and I’m staring into the abyss with no real reason not to just jump in. Then I wrote this. Now I’m going to bed.
Hopefully I’ll feel a bit more sane in the morning.
Posted by Misha on June 4, 2010
We could all pretend to be on a train home and discuss our days. I woke up late, went to the pub and then the park.
That’s all really.
night.
Posted by Gabi on June 4, 2010
I will be very sad to see We Need Answers go. It was an amazing show with some of the best comic talent around.
Nuhnight x
Posted by elin on June 4, 2010
You forgot the most important thing!
Did you have both phone chargers?
And did you remember the milk?!
Posted by Maddie on June 4, 2010
Night night Mark.
…I too will miss We Need Answers.
Posted by Emmy on June 4, 2010
RIP We Need Answers. You will be sorely missed.
Nighty night Mark. Don’t let the bedbugs bite.
Posted by Joanna on June 4, 2010
I’ll add my voice to the chorus of those mourning We Need Answers. Once more the BBC has axed one of my favourite shows before it really got going (The Peter Serafinowicz Show, anyone?). Shame.
Now bedtime.
Nernight Mark x
Posted by lisa brunders on June 4, 2010
PS A very dear friend of mine says “every disappointment is a blessing”, a much nicer version of every cloud. So I expect it’ll all turn out for the best in some way which we can see just now.
Posted by lisa brunders on June 4, 2010
Chatting’s great too.
I was a fan of We Need Answers, shame about the BBC, you’re right about it being catch22.
Goodnight, don’t forget the milk!
Posted by hornseygirl on June 4, 2010
Sleep tight,
Saw you on a Dave ‘Mock the Week’ re-run earlier this evening – great improv on the topic of mugging. : )
Posted by Rosanna on June 4, 2010
Ashford show was great! Thank you SO much for talking to us afterwards. Really appreciated your being so nice and friendly. Thank youuuu xxx
Posted by Beth on June 4, 2010
I’ve got nothing of value to say, really, just that I will miss We Need Answers and I really think it should have been given more of a chance.
I’ve waited up for this, so now that I’ve read and posted I’m off to bed.
Night! x