Edinburgh: best of times, worst of times
First of all – thanks for participating in yesterday’s debate on what should be done about an unpleasant comment left on the site, and, by extension, a huge number of far more unpleasant comments daubed - like so much birdshit on the windscreen a Fiat Punto - over my Yahoo! blog.
(I don’t know anything about cars so I feel a bit of an impostor casually namechecking the Punto like it’s meant to mean something. I just wanted a car which I imagine to be fairly minor, cheery and inoffensive like me).
There were some very nice comments – particular thanks to Megan for introducing the wonderful insult ‘asshats’, which I assume is a North American thing – and a pleasing lack of mob violence. And there’s a semi-happy end to the story because Dave Fields, the author of the mildly upsetting remarks that triggered the blog, not only entered the conversation himself but ended up sending an email to my agent apologising for ‘breaking protocol’ and wishing me a successful career. I think this proves that Mr Fields was merely someone who doesn’t much rate my writing – which he’s perfectly entitled not to do – rather than one of the faceless freaks who lurk in the seedier neighbourhoods of the internet. The problem of those sub-human, invisible hecklers remains. But it’s a problem with the World Wide Web as a whole, or to fair a problem the world as a whole, and I should probably get some perspective and not allow it to feel like a personal vendetta against me. Good.
And speaking of paranoia: Edinburgh is approaching. Although it’s not until August, tickets for my show went on sale this week (at http://www.assemblyfestival.com/ , plug fans). And this is only the latest of series of rather dizzying milestones which ensure that the process of doing an Edinburgh show is always slightly ahead of you. The show’s on sale before you’ve finished writing it. The posters are made before you know what you want them to look like. The blurb is on the Fringe website and in the brochure well before you’re remotely confident that your show will, indeed, be ‘AMAZING – ***** (The Guardian). The name of the show has to be decided some months before you know what it’ll be about. And so on. Essentially, Edinburgh is an exercise in making a load of promises you’re not sure if you will be able to keep. In that respect, I guess it’s quite a lot like parenting.
The importance of the festival as a means of ‘making it big’ as a comic is often exaggerated. People like Michael McInytre, Rhod, Russell (I’m so cool I’m on first name terms with these guys) have tended to become famous by establishing themselves on TV; the bulk of their live following comes from that, however hard they’ve worked as fringe comics. Russell and I played the same, 100-seat, room in 2006, for instance.
But what Edinburgh does do, more surely than any other event in the comedic calendar, is test you as a comedian. 27 shows in 28 days take a surprising physical toll and a far-from-surprising psychological one. You’re reviewed constantly, many of the reviews having the potential to make or break your ticket sales, all of them having the ability to make you cry (only happened once to me last time out). The entire comedy industry – agents, PR, promoters, producers, TV executives, and assorted arseholes - decamps to the normally-beautiful Scottish capital and hangs out in bars, weighing up comics against one another, preening and fussing and comparing and bitching like those women in Sex And The City (except the redhead, I like her). And all the time, it is raining. Raining, raining, raining, raining, raining, raining. Some years it rains slightly more than that.
Why do it, then, especially if you’re one of the 95 percent of acts who won’t make a profit? The answer is that it’s still the best arts festival in the world, for all its many injustices and miseries; still the greatest measure of a comedian’s mettle; and still one of the only mainstream festivals where you can pull off ridiculous nonsense like, say, a 24-hour show (I did also do that in Melbourne, but those are probably the only two), or The Hotel, or the thousands of not-by-Mark-Watson oddities which cram the Fringe every year. And it’s pretty much the only place where for a whole month, an act like me can play to large-ish audiences of genuine comedy fans, and, moreover, exist in an atmosphere where comedy feels like the biggest thing in the world. So that’s probably what it’s all really about. Comedians are attention-seekers by definition. Edinburgh is Attention Central, for better or worse.
Unless nobody comes to see you, of course. But I’ll save my observations on that experience in case it happens this year and I have to blog a month’s worth of bitter rants. Until then – if you’re planning a visit to the Fringe, do click on that link and buy tickets, go on. Whatever my other deficiences, I do a pretty mean Edinburgh show if I say it myself.
There we are, a bit of optimism at the end of a rotten week. My ten-year vow is still alive. Battered, but alive. Like comedians at the end of Edinburgh. Bring it on. I think.
Posted by Knox on May 9, 2011
I had every intention to ‘be good’ and not go to Edinburgh last summer – I couldn’t really afford it, I needed to be saving, and I’d been the previous couple of years. Then I did that thing where I just thought ‘well, there’s no harm in just *looking* at the tickets for Mark’s show. I mean, it’s not like I have less will power than a junkie let loose in a crack den…’ – I think probably within five minutes of that, I’d booked tickets for your show, and so then had to come to edinburgh. thank you :0)
Posted by Lucy on April 11, 2010
I lived in edinburgh for 4+ years and fully appreciate the madness of the festival. It does completely transform the city, in both good and bad ways. It must be gruelling in many ways for the performers. But I think worth it… Many random shows I have ended up seeing, chosen randomly or not chosen at all but happening by chance, have led me to a bunch me great comedians who I’ve seen on their real tours, subsequently… Whose books I’ve bought, and blogs I’ve read. Though it’s becoming so overpopulated now that the talent and forcefulness of the people handing out flyers could be more of an influence on your audience size and profit than the actual content of your show, it’s still one of the best places to gain fans.
Good luck with your show, just try not to burn out. And look around the pleasance bar and the royal mile pubs at the usually balding, suit wearing, laptop wielding journalists & reviewers. Take a moment to take in just how little some of them are enjoying themselves, how utterly sad some of their lives must be. They often seem pained by the crowds and desperate to leave. Take solace in that. They’re just (often quite sad) people paid to criticise what they could never do themselves. Even if they slate you, their opinion isn’t everything and festival-goers know that. At least you’re not as miserable as them. At least you enjoy your job and are a nice person.
Posted by Ellen paaal on April 10, 2010
I live right next door to Edinburgh and I’ve been to the festival every year of my life and swear it’s my favourite time of the year! anyone who is considering it, go! Even if it’s pissing it down its still a good laugh. Shall be saving up money to buy as many tickets as possible. cannot wait!
Posted by Terry on April 10, 2010
I’m definately coming up for my first fringe this year, and hopefully this will be a yearly thing for me, hopefully one year I can do the whole month.
As soon as I get paid tickets will be bought and then i shall sit and shake with excitement for the next few months in anticipation.
Two questions though: If you were to have any cake in the world what would it be? And can you recommend any other good shows that wont get the attention they deserve?
See you soon!
Posted by EmmaT on April 9, 2010
I would love to come to Edinburgh over the summer, alas I am saving up all my holiday to complete the first of my TYSIC challenges.
Wishing you the best of luck Mark, hope it all goes well and I am sure with a bunch of these guys there it will be fantastico. I will be there in spirit and then in person a bit further south in Brighton in October!
Posted by lisa brunders on April 9, 2010
You make the Festival sound like a wonderful experience, despite the rain.
I managed to catch you on the Now Show, and you were great. I know you’ve had a rotten week, but you’ve been on channel 4 and Radio 4, so it was far from all bad. Keep the faith.
Posted by Rachael on April 9, 2010
I hope next week is a better one for you
Posted by david on April 9, 2010
Looking forward to seeing you up there mark. This year is my first fringe as a performer, as part of the ‘improverts’ at 00:30 and also in a show with two of my friends called ‘charmed forces’ at 14:00. it’s about a mis-guided variety act that has gone to entertain the troops in afghanistan. i think you would like it, we’ve been influenced by you and many other comedians that we like to call the ‘kind comedians’. (basden, key, sweet etc). if you let me know far enough in advance i can probably save you a ticket. (no promises, you might have to stand at the back) i hope our fringes are more good than bad, sun than rain, stars than not having any stars.
Posted by Katie on April 9, 2010
Last year was my first Fringe, and I intend on coming back this year. It was my “proper” first Fringe, because I stayed through in Edinburgh. In the years previous, I’d normally just go through for a day at a time. I live in Glasgow, so it’s only an hour on the train.
(I hesitate to mention that I saw your “Edit” show, met you afterwords, and practically committed my undying love to you because you spelled my name right when you signed my ticket. I’d just like to apologise for that. Sorry. I’m really hoping you don’t remember.)
I can deal with the rain. I actually quite like it – I’m not too good in the heat, and the rain gives me an excuse to moan, which I do love. I love Edinburgh during the Fringe because throughout the rest of the year, it’s pretty average (except during the Book Festival – that’s when shit really gets heavy, I can assure you).
Anyway, I haven’t bought a ticket for your show because I’m trying to decided what days to go through, but I will certainly buy one. Eventually. And when I’m not totally skint. So that might be a while.
Posted by Kate W on April 9, 2010
I think you’ve distilled the essence of Edinburgh beautifully there! Despite how financially, emotionally and physically ruinous it can be, it is utterly addictive. Not being there in August is like knowing there’s the most amazing party happening and you’re missing it.
Having done a few Edinburgh shows (not as a performer, I hasten to add – no-one deserves that), this’ll be the second year in a row I don’t do one. I have a tremendous feeling of having wussed out. I will however be taking my best stab at enthusiastic audience member, especially at your show.
Posted by Daniel on April 9, 2010
I’m hoping to go to the festival for the first time this year and am extremely excited. Also you were brilliant on The Now Show. I was asleep and managed to wake up just as you were introduced. Weird…
Posted by A lot of Rach[a]els on April 9, 2010
This will be my 3rd Ed and once I decided when I’m actually going up, tickets for your show will be brought. Can’t wait
Posted by Emmy on April 9, 2010
I’ve never been to the Festival, which is something that depresses me to no end. I can’t afford to go this year either.
But, someday, somehow, I will go.
Best of luck with it Mark! All of us are cheering for you!
__________
Have just finished listening to you on the Now Show. You were brillant!
Posted by elin on April 9, 2010
Listening to The Now Show, and Mark, you needn’t have worried! You are a very funny man.
Posted by Megan on April 9, 2010
Oh, asshat is one of the most versatile words of all. I am pleased to have taught a few more Brits about it.
–
I live very far away, but, if my vacation time/budget allows, I am going to make a stop in on my way back from Eastern Europe (assuming my trip happens in August as planned).
I’ve only been twice. Once, when I was a broke student taking courses at the University of Edinburgh for a summer (I saw David Mitchell and Robert Webb in two shows, including a production of ‘The Liar’). I didn’t really ‘get’ what the Fringe was before diving right in, spending grocery/beer money on tickets to things I found intriguing/confusing. (Norman Lovett winked at me when I was queuing for his show; a highlight of my young, sad little life.)
I didn’t get to go again until 2008 (and, sadly, couldn’t find anyone to come with me) and saw 13 (?) shows in four days, getting soaked to the bone every time I went outside. I went to Mark’s show based on having seen him on ‘Never Mind the Buzzcocks’ (on YouTube, since we’re not cool enough for such things), but also saw other great comedians to whom I only had limited exposure previously.
Since I’m foreign, the only other means of finding out about British comedy are the internet (by means legal and not) and the random semi-current television program (we’re still getting reruns of (the brilliant) ‘Black Books’, I think, which is not exactly new, and, no shit, ‘Are You Being Served?’ and ‘The Vicar of Dibley’). I imagine that a lot of North Americans and other foreigners without access to British broadcasts would be baffled by choice. (I pretend to be an expert because I did live in Brum to do my postgraduate work, though, so when I went in 2008, I knew who many/most of the stalwarts were, having spent many a night watching ‘QI’, ‘HIGNFY’, and other panel shows I dearly wish would air here. (Lucy Porter, during her show, ended up talking to me and stopped to explain Jim Davidson. She was shocked to find out someone ‘from the Americas’ knew about that horror already.))
(I need to get over my parentheses love.)
My point, and I do have one, is that the Fringe is a great opportunity to get exposure with people who are in Edinburgh on a lark, even if I get the sense that it’s like an annual bootcamp for comedians. It helped my comedy mind evolve just as an audience member, really, and for that, I will always love it.
Also, while there, I was rarely swayed by posters or reviews, actually; I found that the galas and ‘chat shows’ (like Stephen K. Amos’s) were what really swayed me to standup shows I was unsure about. (Unfortunately, I waited too long and couldn’t get tickets to Sarah Millican. Bah!)
Posted by Kate on April 9, 2010
I’m very excited about the summer! I’ve been travelling up to Edinburgh to go to the fringe for the last 4 years and I have enjoyed every visit. The atmosphere there is incredible and it really is hard to find anywhere else like it, where you can see 7 or 8 shows a day. To anyone that hasn’t been I really recommend it!
Posted by Zoe Fell on April 9, 2010
It’ll be my first trip to the Fringe this year. I’m beyond excited.
Mark – rest assured. I have just, this minute bought a ticket for your Edinburgh show on the 19th of August. And cannot wait.
Also, correct me if I’m wrong but haven’t you sold out every year since 2006 at the Festival? You’ve honestly got nothing to worry about.
Stay optimistic lovely.
xoxoxoxo
Posted by glamlovinkitty on April 9, 2010
Tickets were got the day they went on sale. I don’t fanny about!
Posted by Sam on April 9, 2010
When I said to someone I was planning on going to the Fringe this year, if I had the money. They assumes I was going up to perform.
I didn’t correct them.
Instead I gave it the big I am, “Yeah I’ve only done one stand up set, but that went well, I’m ready. Sure it’s the largest arts festival in the world, but all I need to do is speak shit at people for an hour, I can do that. Boom.”
Posted by Lizzie on April 9, 2010
Definitely coming. I shall get my friends similarly excited.
Posted by Misha on April 9, 2010
I’m really quite excited for this years Edinburgh, and equally as determined that I won’t cry at the poor man who works in the lovely fudge shop this year.
Yep, it’s just as exhausting physically and mentally if you aren’t doing a show, especially if you’re seeing anything up to 6 shows in a day (a fringe day that is, lunchtime through to about 2am)
Can’t wait!
Posted by rachel (pandora) on April 9, 2010
you’re top of my edinburgh list. i do enjoy a ‘pretty mean’ show. x