How to operate with a blown mind
I’m writing this at 2am, the kind of time I’ve done a lot of my life’s writing. So far, although the arrival of our son has had its usual, punishing effect on sleep levels, I’m not holding up too badly. There are many ways in which I feel ‘not quite up to’ being a parent – which is my newly-optimistic way of expressing ‘complete, icy-hearted terror – but, continuing the theme of positivity – I do feel I’ll probably be able to cope with the sleeplessness, and even turn it to my advantage by becoming more productive at night, in what have always been my favourite working hours.
Because of the 24-hour shows, ‘not sleeping’ is one of the main things I’m renowned for being able to achieve, and people are constantly asking me how I’ve managed it in the past. Quite a lot of the people I correspond with on Twitter, or on the internet in general, are insomniacs who ask me the secret of not being exhausted. Even people who are pretty happy with their sleep routines sometimes solicit my advice.
There’s a good chance that before long, the ultimate sleep-deprivation challenge of a baby will bring even me to my weary knees, and I will lose my reputation for stamina. So while it still endures, here are a few tips on keeping awake for ages without either dying, or wishing to.
- CON YOURSELF. The key to 24-hour shows for me was always basically convincing my body I hadn’t been up that long. At regular intervals I would pretend it was a normal-length day, even literally lying to myself about the time. A big part of not succumbing to the fatigue of a very long day is simply refusing to acknowledge that it has been a long day. You can, as it were, keep yourself in the dark about this for quite some time.
- ENERGY DRINKS ARE A FALSE FRIEND. Red Bull and its taurine-laden copycats are a bad way to stay awake in my experience. You’re buzzing with fake energy for about 90 minutes, then drained afterwards. So I wouldn’t recommend it unless you are looking to get through a football match and you don’t think you will be substituted. Likewise, coffee, although very handy for short-term lifts, shouldn’t be trusted as the solution to all tiredness problems. Stamina is about maintaining an even keel rather than shooting yourself up with adrenalin. My favourite aids are sugary tea and bananas. And chocolate biscuits.
- GO OUT IN THE FRESH AIR. A few minutes of night air can give you as much as a couple of hours’ recharge. This works best in countries other than England where you cannot survive outside at night for more than half the year.
- GET OVER THE EIGHT. Last week in a blog, I breezily claimed – without any scientific evidence – that the body doesn’t really need eight hours sleep. It could well be that I’m dangerously wrong; certainly, I wouldn’t like to take on an actual scientist on this point. But I’ve known quite a few people who obsess over ‘the eight hours’ (‘if I don’t get eight hours I’ll be shattered in the morning’, etc) and it does them no favours at all. Once you’ve set a norm which you feel you have to live up to, you’ll quickly start to feel alarmed if you go even marginally under it. And that alarm will translate into fatigue. And the prophecy of being shattered will fulfil itself. The fact is people have managed with three or four hours a night and not just avoided being ill, but been enormously successful. Both Margaret Thatcher and Alex Ferguson are noted for their three-hour-a-night record. Admittedly one is awfully grumpy in interviews and the other tried to unravel the welfare state, but still.
- DON’T PANIC! On the same note: the main lesson of all is simply, don’t panic. Insomnia only gets worse and worse the more you acknowledge it, like nausea or being very red in the face. The fact is, some nights in life you’ll sleep well, some nights you won’t. It’s fine. You’ll be fine. No-one will die. Unless you’re flying a plane or something. Sweet dreams.
Posted by David on March 2, 2010
This is my little piece of advice for those people that can’t sleep at night because they have a bunch of thoughts buzzing around their head: get out a pencil and paper and write it all down. The next morning you can burn/shred/recycle the paper – this gives you the freedom to write down the more personal thoughts.
Another fool proof way to get a good nights sleep is to go for a long bike ride during the day in the outdoors (a stationary exercise bike won’t help) or commute to work by bike – especially if it’s over 10 miles away and through the countryside. There’s something about the steady, rhythmic pattern of cycling that just sets the mind up for a good nights sleep. No need to pedal like a nutter either.
Hope this helps someone out there!
Posted by Mark Watson on March 2, 2010
Thank you Lisa! Keep reading!
Posted by Lisa Brunders on March 2, 2010
I’m really enjoying your blogging. And I’m impressed you’re coping with a newborn too, it’s admirable.
And I’m breezing through my busy week at work, not stressing and keeping a positive attitude, inspired by your earlier blog. and now this sleep blog has arrived at just the right time, as the long hours of work and the buzzing mind are shortening my sleep, and you’re teaching me that lack of sleep isn’t a problem either! Brilliant. If you carry on like this I’ll have no problems left by the end of the week.
Keep up the good work, it’s doing me the world of good. Thank you.
Posted by Heather Jones on March 2, 2010
Re sleep deprivation of new parents – reminds me of what we did to cope. Now I’m not suggesting this would suit you & yours, Mark, (or anyone else necessarily) but 19 years ago when our 1st son was born we went for the (somewhat hippy sounding) bed sharing approach in order to (among other worthier baby-focussed reasons) minimise the stress of night-feeding and disrupted sleep – see ‘Three in a Bed’ book still avail from Amazon – if anyone interested to know more) The book makes the point that in many human societies waking momentarily many times in the night was the norm – people might even share a quick joke or a chat and then just go back to sleep.
The idea of bed-sharing worked a treat for us with both our sons and meant that breast-feeding in the middle of the night was just a momentarily bit of wakefulness and then back to sleep for both me & baby (with Dad not even noticing). I didn’t even need to sit up! Admittedly we had a slightly crowded phase with 2 yr old toddler getting out of own cot (the way kids do at that age) and into bed with us when 2nd tiny son was already in the bed – but it all worked out fine with unproblematic transfer of both tots into own beds in due course.
Please note that this bed-with-baby thing was something we researched carefully and went into with considerable understanding and knowledge (eg we had a waterbed which we loved but got rid of it because it would have been less safe re overlaying) Overlaying is always what people worry about but normal instincts (as long as unimpaired by alcohol, drugs or overly soft/water bed) are trustworthy. A relative went for a variation on the arrangement by using side-down cot right up against bed, like a ‘bed-extension’ for the baby.
Posted by MrMatt on March 2, 2010
Excellent blog as per Mr W. Some good advice there on how to cope with little sleep.
Posted by max on March 2, 2010
Good post as usual Mark.
Now, can someone tell me how to actually get work done?
I’m struggling with that one. I have no problems to sleep, I have no problems to pull all nighters, BUT I do have a problem with actually working. I procrastinate so hard that ANY kind of work for me is immediately equal to just doing nothing for the whole duration of the project and then staying up for a couple of nights while actually working against the clock.
Invariably, I will repeat: “this is the last time”, “Next time I’m starting a week earlier” or “If I could only have one more day….”
It’s frustrating for me. And now even more so because I have a huge deadline coming 3 months from now. And my workdays basically consist on finding new music and checking facebook.
Mark, someone. HELP ME
Posted by Gabi on March 2, 2010
The not panicking is the big one for me. If you relax yourself and effectively post the bad thoughts which are keeping you awake in a magical letter box in your mind, you automatically are able to let the sleepy zees take over. Very much enjoying this bloggle
Posted by Calum on March 2, 2010
Not only do you not need eight hours a day, but the research that was quoted on QI found that people who sleep for roughly eight hours a day are actually more likely to die younger, compared to those who sleep for more or less.
It turns out that the average adult also wakes up many times during the night, something which always used to bother me…
Posted by Rachael on March 2, 2010
Another excuse for tea and biscuits? Excellant!
Posted by CarlitoBurrito on March 2, 2010
Completely agree with every point. Finished my degree last year and I think I’m still recovering from a number of work-related all nighters. Coffee and energy drinks definitely ruined my life in the second year, so my third year I powered through the droopy eye stage by running round the building every hour. Totally freshens you up.
p.s. Excited for the 4th of March.
Posted by Tom Beasley on March 2, 2010
I find that Misha’s point below is very valid as I struggle to sleep if I have only just turned off my computer. On the other hand, I can quite happily feel drowsy if I watch TV for a while just before turning in.
Posted by Eck on March 2, 2010
By the time your son is old enough he may be taught how to sleep at school. http://bit.ly/9rgOhT
Posted by Misha on March 2, 2010
Having a long sleep before hand is good if you intend on being up for a few days.
But if you just can’t sleep getting up again helps. Lying in bed gets you no-where. Unless you’re peacefully enjoying watching a film or listening to the radio etc. But that’s another matter.
Interestingly something I learnt when I had a long period of insomnia, is that you should turn off anything with a screen after about 10pm. The light they emit prevents the body from producing melatonin (only produced in the dark) which is a hormone that helps you sleep. Some people naturally lack melatonin (like me) and you can be prescribed it. But sometimes just making the room dark helps.
Posted by Ben on March 2, 2010
i’m always impressed when people have a real idea how many hours they’ve slept. i know what time i wake up (because its whenever i set my alarm for) but how do you know what time you go to sleep? unless you keep checking your clock when you’re in bed, in which case you never get to sleep…
i guess a lot of people fall asleep shortly after going to bed, but it’s never been that way for me. it takes hours for my mind to switch off, but once i’m asleep, i stay asleep. i probably get a whole BUNCH of hours.
Posted by Gareth on March 2, 2010
I’d always thought the phrase was “if I don’t get my six hours…” and even fall short at achieving this most nights. Still, it doesn’t bother me. I’m extremely comfortable with staying up late, never really “feel” tired, until I physically get in the bed.
Posted by Laura on March 2, 2010
You don’t often see a Lo Fidelity Allstars reference on the information super highway. Good work, Mark!
Posted by Hannah on March 2, 2010
This is immense. Has made me feel loads better about my own current sleep problems! Since having a baby I have managed to become an insomniac when before I could sleep like the dead. Bizarre. I’m getting better at coping on 5-6 hours of broken sleep a night. Your body just gets used to it I guess…
Posted by Emma on March 2, 2010
Thank you for posting this! It’s what counsellors will tell you if you’re a terrible insomniac and more.
Posted by Phill on March 2, 2010
You don’t need eight hours a day – I know this because I saw it on QI recently. Apparently the average for an adult is 6-7 hours.
So feel more confident now that you know you have the might of the QI researchers behind you
Posted by Chris on March 2, 2010
I’ve always had trouble sleeping. My mind feels like a poorly configured windows machine, that can’t shut down. In most cases, I’ll eventually fall sleep, but could wake up after a few hours and then the process starts again. This is the 4th night in a row that I’ve barely had over 4 hours sleep. A coffee and a banana seems to help this hangover type feeling, as does this OxyFresh spray I’ve been using for the last couple of days.
Posted by Sam on March 2, 2010
Another hint: Don’t curl up in bed and start thinking sleepy thoughts. Really doesn’t help.