Still reeling from the sight of my life neatly divided into scrapbook-size clippings and displayed on Tumblr. And by reeling I mean being fairly pleased in a narcissistic way. We have now identified the curator (Hannah, an Australian) and her deputy, and offended one person mildly with the ‘fuckyeahmarkwatson’ title. Maybe someone can write a little program so that if you type in ‘goshyesiagreemarkwatson’, it redirects automatically to the right page. The same software could be used by porn sites so that if you are too sheepish to google some of the seedier things you’re looking for, you could just put in ‘ladies in various, rather contrived forms of undress’ and it will convert it into real terms for you. I’m tempted to go and google ‘ladies in various, rather’ etc now but I’m on a hotel server and I expect they have ways of monitoring these things.
(Anecdote: my colleague Mickey D once bought the porn channel in a hotel room and then it didn’t work properly. He had to go down to reception and complain that his porn wasn’t working. Such is the shamelessness of this rogue that he toughed it out and made sure the issue was rectified.)
How did we get onto porn?
Well, back to literature. I’m going to be doing a series of book readings in and around London – and by that, I mean, London and Hay-on-Wye – to publicise the paperback release of Eleven. If you’ve not read the book yet, this could be your chance to do just that. Even if you have read it, this new edition contains a question-and-answer session with the author (me, Mark Watson) prattling on. Also a new ending where everything works out pretty much perfectly.
Whether you have or haven’t read the book, though, or ever intend to, I’d like these events to be slightly more fun(ky) than book events sometimes are, i.e. more than five people and wine that isn’t awful. And a general sense of chaotic stand-up type fun mixed in with the reading bits. A bit like the rain-sodden Edinburgh tour that some of you gamely endured last August. So it might be worth coming, in all honesty.
These things will take place in July and August. More details tomorrow. There can’t be many bloggers so diligent that they give 24 hours’ notice of an announcement of an event. Or perhaps, many bloggers so anxious to spin out minimal material over more than one day. Who knows? Either way, ready your literary-fun-receptors. You’re going to need those things this summer. Now excuse me, I’m off to Tumblr to gaze at myself in a suit. Or shirtless.